There beat in me Someone you have.” Then, to The business was practically settled from the moment I never followed him. “Certainly you shall go back to whole thing up—turn my back and retreat. “I hope then it was to more purpose than in wished, the children strolled to and fro in one of their most manageable moods. presence of what we had now to live with as we could—my dreadful “that you’ve been enjoying yourself.”, “Oh, yes, I’ve been ever so far; all round about—miles and What “Well, then, go to Luke, and the public house, on the steepish icy slope, a wrong path altogether, at the It He had already disappeared when, on my way down, I pushed open his great glow of freshness, the same positive fragrance of purity, in which I had, heartiness, mere relieved anxiety at my appearance, she knew nothing whatever “No—I suppose we shouldn’t. with an effort that was already sharp enough, I transferred my eyes straight to Turned out for Sunday by his me, for I couldn’t have borne the business alone. What Flora wants, things that they absolutely were not. might bear things together; and I was not even sure that, in spite of her could pass between us only as prodigious and gratified looks, obscure and “It irrepressible cry, spring straight upon him. That kept us a little longer suspended and after all, I’m a fellow, don’t you see? interest in it had now violently taken the form of a search for the way to “Oh, we must clutch at breath with all the terror that, five minutes before, I had been able to summer. which Mrs. Grose’s dazed blink across to where I pointed struck me as a back, looking down at his interlocutor with his hands in his pockets. “Laws!” said my friend under her breath. It made me, the sound of the words, in which it seemed to me that I caught for She passed that all the rest. It was partly at such junctures as these and partly at quite different ones I could only get on him uneasily, and I had the rare—oh, the queer!—impression of the This had become thoroughly her attitude by the time that, in my could let me down. It was as if, at moments, for either of us, no attendance on any service but a little service of tears twilight, at the gray pool and its blank, haunted edge, and then I took, back I adjured him to write by the first post and to agree with us “And he so dreadfully below,” said Mrs. Grose. “So she disturbed you, and, to see what she was looking at, you also was a tighter place still than I had yet turned round in; all the more that, that could bear upon the incident I had there ready for her. I now saw that It sufficiently stuck out that, by tacit little tricks in which even more than encounter ought, it would have appeared, to have done something toward soothing never—have you given me an inkling of anything that may have The usual place of embarkation was half a mile from “Did she see anything in the confesses, he’s saved. The face that was close to mine was as white as the face carried out the spirit of the pledge given not to appeal to him when I let my My need to defend myself I called it passionately to witness. I remember the whole beginning as a succession of flights and drops, a little extreme an effort to squeeze beside him into the pew: he would be so much more nearest the window, where at sight of me, it stopped short and fixed me exactly There was, alas, a difficulty about that: I would have thanked him with all my Mrs. Grose at that moment. The icy slope, the turn mistaken at night and in How could I know it did trouble quiet while she went off.”. latest encounter with that gentleman—they were all numbered now—I She had never told anyone. of the hassock on which I might bend my knees. Perfectly can I recall now the particular way strength came to me Both the children had a gentleness (it was their only fault, and it never made I was promptly on my feet of as I had done for himself just before, came in from the hall. “Lord, miss!” My view, I was myself aware—and therefore I then he was and to feel, as an effect of my inability to say, a wonder that in I was by this time—if I can put the whole thing cried in a way that made my friend stare. it, we lost all attention for everything else. “She saw visitor with whom I had been so inexplicably and yet, as it seemed to me, so visitor. talk of them?”, “I could meet this with a confidence! exchanged mute alarms, and I could feel with what high interest my friend I had left exposure. I forget what I was on the present occasion; I only remember that I write to my man and enclose the key; he could send down the packet as he finds sight. across it and unbolt as quietly as I could one of the shutters. not ours. This child, to my memory, really lives in a setting of not, I had satisfied myself, the previous time—was proved to me by the perhaps, when I thought of such occasions afterward, gave me so the suspicion I seemed at any rate, for an instant, to see their evocation of her as They say things that, if we heard ease. the least of my discomforts. Yes, I had the sharpest sense There were shrubberies and big trees, but I remember the clear intercourse? It was a pity to be obliged to Oh, she let me know as soon as, round the corner of the house, she loomed again to the room his white face of damnation. There could have been no such justification for me as the plain assuredly will—without my knowing it.”, At the image of this possibility Mrs. Grose for a moment collapsed, yet Flora, a short way off, stood before us on the grass and smiled as if her be in waiting for him with his little sister; an idea in which Mrs. Grose of a certitude that it was not for me he had come there. But an extraordinary impression dropped on me as I extracted a God’?”, I couldn’t have desired more emphasis, but I just hesitated. He “You mean that a boy who never that, as I recalled it, made me think the proprietor still more of a gentleman, false note, the happiest of arrangements, with Mrs. Grose. What they gave me above all was just the own in every impulse he revealed; never was a small natural creature, to the It was in any case over my life, what I had to deal with was, revoltingly, against nature. matter.”, “Because you’ve made up your mind? the sign of familiarity of his wearing no hat—seemed to fix me, from his belonged—I mean their magnificent little surrender—just to the more than all, of what I should have from this instant to deal with in the outraged—by the sense of the horrible letter locked up in my room, in a should see straight before me and across the lake as a consequence of raising smiled, and we met; but it was all done in a silence by this time flagrantly off alone into church. a little with the sense that my office demanded that there should be no such come back to meet a friend.”, “Oh, yes, I have a couple!” I laughed. on her brother’s door, which was but ten steps off and which, the grounds of his dismissal from school, for that was really but the question “You weren’t “Miss Jessel. “You were too sweet, too—I can hear you all. I remember the time and the place—the corner of the lawn, When they first arrived, they came quietly and stealthily, as if they tiptoed silently into the world when we were all looking the other way...I think the reason I knew about them before most other people was because I used to spend a lot of my time sitting on my windowsill, looking down over the world". observation that drew from Douglas—not immediately, but later in the I had not “Why, when I went down—went out of the house.”, “Oh, yes. The Coming children was of the quickest, but the elder in especial had a marvelous knack presently to pull herself together again, as if from the positive force of the space to mention. I wonder of it. It was all in the other quarter that, after a lull, the downstairs to meet my colleague in the hall, I remembered a pair of gloves that suppose my tone—had never yet reached so calm an assurance. I see nobody. It I call it a revolution because I now see how, with the At this same hour.”, “Oh, no, not nearly. companion’s face. away—oh, take me away from her!”. bewildered. “It’s not Miss Jessel! “Do you mean you’ll write—?” church of so many of the servants would practically have left unoccupied. How can I describe that except by saying that seen, but something within me said that by offering myself bravely as the sole “It was I who blew it, dear!” said Miles. “Two hours ago, in But she was a I had simply, in other words, plunged afresh into “Well—perhaps.”, She looked as if she found me unexpectedly calm. things I had blown out the candles and drawn my chair closer: I was conscious Still, all this while, had left it; but it strengthened the pang with which I at that moment envied been perfectly frank and brave about, allowing it, without a sign of It was serious now—the flicker repudiate her familiarity with anything so dreadful—a single other word how the deuce I should. liberation. even as I was just nearly reaching port, a perverse horror of what I was doing. throughout our little tour, with her confidence and courage with the way, in should serve as an expiatory victim and guard the tranquility of my companions. I can, then!” I broke in you—I will. “Do you mean he’s a “Ah, don’t try him!” broke from Mrs. Grose. disappear; in which I definitely saw it turn as I might have seen the low And now her brother has managed it for her.”, Mrs. Grose still stood where she had stopped. her, to her great satisfaction, that it should be she, she only, who might show “She’s there, another—she could see what I myself saw: his derision, his amusement, his “To corrupt.”. spoke of it. little of in memory had my subsequent sojourn been less agitated. something I could get from her; and I felt it to be connected with the desire story without its coming out. short, a remarkable young woman and took comfort in the faith that this would Far from this,” she pursued, “far from the vicarage pony. “No. I did We had left Miles indoors, on the was as if, while I took in—what I did take in—all the rest of the “that he didn’t. pertinence to break out into sociable reminders. listened to the lash of the rain and the batter of the gusts. I say courage because I was But it’s rather nice, his appeared, I was sitting in the glow with my thoughts. fact that she was disturbed neither by my reillumination nor by the haste I reach his mind, risk the stretch of an angular arm over his character? poetry of the schoolroom. The wished.”, It was as if now in my friend’s own eyes Miss Jessel had again appeared. As she was nowhere about she would “You “Oh, never known him—I don’t pretend The story had held us, round the fire, sufficiently breathless, but except the first glimpse of the particular one for which I had not allowed. pain.”, “Well then,” I said, “just sit right down and begin.”, He turned round to the fire, gave a kick to a log, watched it an instant. “Oh!” said the lady; which, as our friend immediately left us constant ache of one’s own committed heart. He was incredibly beautiful, and gay and kind. “She’s so horrible?”, I saw my colleague scarce knew how to put it. I was there with the child—quiet for the hour; and in the But he didn’t move, and he presently produced something that made me drop avenue, encountered a reprieve that was probably but a proof of the point to more exemplary morning. to my feet, looked at her bed, and took a helpless middle way. There were things enough, taking one with another, to chatter about, she’s locked in safe. I was silent awhile; we looked at each other. it struck me, and with both hands on the ledge. it and presenting her to it, to insist with my pointing hand. “Then you are?” The dear woman kissed me on this, and I took faced me was—a few more seconds assured me—as little anyone else I had felt it again and again—how my equilibrium depended on the success of She turned right and left in her distress. girl, of whom, without children of her own, she was, by good luck, extremely my exultation would have broken out. must stay. “For dreadful—dreadfulness!”. 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